Growth Love romance social distancing things to do

The 5 Love Languages: Long-distance Edition

In a huge twist of events, here I am writing about love & romance two weeks in a row. Anyway, it is part of life so let’s get to it, shall we?

Last week on the blog I wrote about whether or not long-distance is worth it, you can read about it here!

This week, as a follow-up, I have teamed up with my friend, Tireni and we thought it would be helpful to talk about the 5 love languages, specifically in times of physical separation. This is very timely as more people than ever have unintentionally joined the LDR squad!

Welcome, welcome, this should help you along the way. We’ll write in the context of romantic relationships but love is love, and most of these tips are easily adaptable and applicable to platonic relationships.

Quality Time

For a partner who values Quality Time, nothing says ”I love you” like your undivided attention. Being there for this type of person is so key- no distractions.

It is important that you show your partner that you value their time and presence. This means you need to get rid of phones, other people, any side tasks, generally anything distracting and just focus on your partner. This will make them feel truly special and loved, thankfully technology has made this slightly easier for us.

Distractions, postponed plans, or not listening to your partner can be very hurtful, so if your partner values quality time, you have to make a conscious effort to keep on being intentional because they deepen their connection with others through spending time with people. You need to be as keen on spending time with them, as though you were physically together.

Practical Tip #1: In times of physical distance, the next best thing is a Video Call. It may seem like a little thing but your partner would most likely prefer voice & video calls to texts because when you’re apart the closest thing they get is seeing and hearing your voice.

Extra Mile: Set a specific date and time and communicate to your partner that you would like it to be uninterrupted – essentially plan a lockdown date night.

This is so important for your partner because this is how they know you care.

Basically, be proactive, be intentional ( your partner does not want to be the one that has to explain how they would like to be loved all the time) and don’t forget to give them your undivided attention-major key!


A common misconception about this love language is that it means such a person is materialistic but this is not the case. The receiver of gifts thrives on the love, thoughtfulness, and effort behind the gift. This shows your partner that you really know them, and you care enough to go the extra mile.

Don’t worry, you can stop holding your breath if this is your partner’s love language because we are happy to inform you that you don’t have to break the bank buying that Designer Wallet or the PS5 with extra storage lol!

Your partner just wants to know they are on your mind, that you remembered that conversation or thing they said in passing and you took the time to think and plan out how you could help or make a difference. This won’t be hard to do it you’re listening to your partner.

Practical Tip #2: So that you believe us when we say you don’t have to break the bank, here are a few suggestions – A framed picture of both of you, sending a care package because you know they had a tough week/are alone, a letter sent in the post, a card, flowers just because, a handwritten note, or just a few of their favourite things/snacks in a box. 

Extra Mile: When it’s that time of the month for your (girl)friend, you can put together a package with her favourite snacks, a candle, pain killers, bath salts and a nice note. 

In this time of social distancing, gifts are definitely a welcome idea and would put a smile on anybody’s face.

In summary, It’s the little things, make sure you’re thinking about something that would be good for them and that you’re paying attention to them.

Acts of Service

This love language requires you to do something helpful or kind for your partner. Anything you do to ease the burden of responsibilities weighing on an “Acts of Service” person will speak volumes. If your partner values this they want to feel supported and they want to know you are interested in the things going on with them.

Laziness, broken commitments, and making more work for your partner tells them that their feelings don’t matter. 

Practical Tip #3: Helping them or their more vulnerable family members order groceries, offering to help if they have school or work deadlines, picking up things they are struggling to do because of multiple commitments i.e. tutoring their sibling, sending helpful resources if they’re applying for jobs as well as going to get supplies and dropping them off where you can.

In summary, the trick is to do things to take the pressure off them and it becomes even more special if you do it before they think about it or need to ask for your help. 

Physical Touch

This love language is pretty straight forward – your partner will enjoy more than most – hugs, hand holding, kisses and all the rest. You know where we are going with this.

If you are miles apart for whatever reason this is a pretty difficult one to pull off and requires extra creativity. Thankfully, we’ve done a lot of thinking so you don’t have to. Physical presence and accessibility are crucial, while neglect can be unforgivable and destructive to your relationship.

Practical Tip #4: Send a teddy or item of clothing with your scent. Now to people whose love language this is, a hot water bottle might help. You can read more about the things you can try here and please share anything else you might think of in the comments section below!

In summary, if this is your partner’s love language you might try focusing on their secondary love language for the duration of the distance, the effort would be appreciated!

Words of Affirmation

Actions don’t always speak louder than words. If this is your love language, unsolicited compliments mean the world to you. Hearing the words, “I love you,” are important— hearing the reasons behind that love might make your day.

On the flip side, unkind words can leave you shattered and may not be easily forgotten. You thrive on hearing kind and encouraging words that build you up. So basically, this love language is all about what you say, this should be easy for most people to do especially now.

Practical Tip #5: This might sound like, “I am really proud of you”, “I am really proud of how productive you’ve been”, “You look really nice today”, “Thank you for making the time and effort to do this”, “Thank you for your help”, “You are always so thoughtful” and of course “I love you/appreciate you/love speaking to you.”

Extra Mile: Send a card or handwritten note expressing how amazing you think they are or send your partner something positive about themselves every day for a week!

Where your partner has attempted to love you according to your love language, and theirs is words of affirmation, telling them how happy it made you will go a long way for both of you.

In summary, a Words of Affirmation person wants to be reminded of how much they mean to you often and how great you think they are!

We hope you enjoyed reading this, at least half as much as we enjoyed writing this because we had a ball!

To find out what your love languages are you can take this short test and also share it with the people you love!

Don’t forget to subscribe so you’re the first to know as soon as a new post hits the blog! Let us know if you enjoyed this in the comments section!

Growth reflections selflove things to do writing

How to Keep a Journal

I have been writing in Journals for as long as I can remember. It has been one of the best ways to protect my peace, plan my next steps and give my mind a break.

Keeping a journal can be therapeutic, it can serve as a guide and remind you of what you want. They are great for sounding out ideas you think might sound crazy or just letting out your daily frustrations.

Here are 5 tips for keeping a journal

Get a notebook!

This is obvious, but some people keep notes on their phone or laptops but going old school is really the best way to go. Actually writing out how you feel, what you’re looking forward to or not goes a long way.

Create the right vibe

Try and find a quiet space and time when you can really hear yourself think.Where you will be comfortable getting in your feelings, whatever those feelings may be.

Bonus tip: light a scented candle and relax

Go with the flow

Most people say they don’t know how to start. A journal is for you-there are no wrong or right entries, so a good place to start is where you are. You can write about your day, you can write about a feeling, you can doodle, you will be surprised where your mind can lead you when you just let go.

No pressure

This is all about you, there is no need to keep it routine. You can Journal whenever you feel like it. You also don’t need perfect handwriting or picture-perfect pages, just write and don’t get too bogged down in the details of how it looks ( unless that’s your thing).

Write out your dreams

We can sometimes be scared to say what we want, a journal is a safe space and will give you the opportunity to work out your fears and hopes. Write out those big dreams and watch them come to life.

Write the vision and engrave it plainly on tablets. So that the one who reads it will run

Habakkuk 2:3

Do you keep a journal already? Have you been meaning to start? Do you have any questions? Let me know in the comments below!

exercise Growth Self selflove social distancing things to do Uncategorized workout

How to workout when you don’t feel like it


Today’s blog post was written by a dear friend of mine who is so passionate about Health & Fitness. The reason it was not written by me is that exercising, for the most part, is not something I am passionate about, although I understand the benefits sometimes I just can’t turn the knowledge to action.

Especially now during these times when we are trying our best to stay safe at home, working out is one of the best ways to keep our minds and bodies healthy.

This is where Mirafiit comes in. She has kindly shared 5 key tips to help with working out when you don’t feel like it.


When some people think of exercising, they think of the obvious things – HIIT, Weight Training, Cardio. But exercise is so much more. For me, understanding the purpose behind a thing helps me stay motivated. On that note, I’ll start off by explaining the purpose of exercising.

We were built to move

Simply put, our bodies were designed for activity. If we don’t stay active, things start to go wrong.

We can sometimes have quite a sedentary lifestyle. This, in addition to overly processed foods and increased portion sizes, means that we have to make an active choice to exercise. Ideally, you should exercise for about 30 mins every day. Right, so now that that’s done, here are five tips on how to exercise when you’re not feeling it!

Make a choice

Change is active. You have to decide to commit to exercise because even though you may not like it, you need it. The benefits of exercise are vast, from preventing heart-related diseases to improving your mood and alleviating depression. Think about this the next time you’re not feeling it, your body depends on your decision.

Change your mindset

Burn the idea that exercise requires a certain type of activity. There are so many different ways to exercise. If you don’t like weight training, skip it. If you’d prefer to do a dance class, find something on YouTube and do it! Take a walk, go for a run, swim, do yoga. Do anything that gets your body moving for at least 30 minutes!

A little becomes a lot

Start off small. The last thing you want to do is set unrealistic targets. You can’t go from sitting on a couch all day to running a marathon. Set daily or weekly attainable and sustainable goals. Go up and down the stairs 10 times, do a 15-minute workout, take a walk. Review those goals as you achieve them and set new goals.

Increase your NEAT: Non-exercise activity thermogenesis

These are things you can do that don’t necessarily feel like exercise but actually help to combat the ills of our sedentary lifestyle. It is really simple, just do more in your day. Do your chores, clean your room, spend more time on your feet, walk round your house every hour, get a standing desk, cook, walk your dog, stand while watching TV. While I would still recommend doing another form of exercise no matter how little, increasing your NEAT is a great place to start!

Play a sport

Although this might not be possible at this time, when this is over you might want to consider joining a sports team (or starting one). Sport is a really fun way of exercising without feeling like you are and it’s also a great way to socialise. The key is choosing a sport you enjoy!

Thank you, Mira, for sharing! You can find Mira on Instagram: @Mirafiit where she shares more knowledge on all things fitness, she also offers personalised fitness plans.

Mirafiit @ The Active Brunch

Please share your comments on how you find motivation to workout!

Don’t forget to subscribe below!

Happy Easter all

movies social distancing things to do things to do in lagos Uncategorized writing

The Best Feel-Good Movies For Social Distancing

In these weird & wonderful times, it is important to protect your peace and keep up the good vibes. So here are 10 of the best feel-good movies for social distancing!

Pretty Womanwatch if you’re in the mood for flirting, fun & shopping

The sun in her face, shopping on Rodeo drive, that complete makeover and watching someone live it up in a fancy hotel? Sprinkle in the romance and grand gesture! What’s not to love? It’s a classic for a reason.

The ProposalWatch if you’re in the mood for laughter, finding a secretly rich husband & risking it all for your job

There’s nothing better than finding out your fake husband is a closet millionaire. Again we have some unexpected romance and a fake wedding. This movie is an all-time fave and never fails to make me laugh.

Two Can Play that Game Watch if you like someone who isn’t taking you seriously

An oldie but a goodie, they don’t actually make them like this anymore. There’s a playbook for love ( apparently) and Shante will help you find it! Enjoy the crazy tips and tricks.

Legally Blonde Watch if you need some motivation/a plan to take on the world

This movie is partly responsible for where I am in life. Elle is good vibes and doesn’t let the haters bring her down. Here we see her stunt on her ex, do the seemingly impossible and refuse to shrink herself in the process!

Last Holiday Watch if you’re ready to risk it all and spend all your life’s savings after Covid-19 passes

Living in the moment takes a whole new definition ( but for a good reason). Definitely a good reminder to focus on the important things and chase your dreams.

Mulan- Watch if you’re in the mood for singing and proving a point

Would this list really be complete without a Disney Classic? This is my personal favourite Disney Princess movie, the soundtrack is amazing.

Home Again – Watch if you’re in the mood for something light & some interior decor inspo

Some light romance sprinkled with a tinge of drama, I really enjoyed watching this movie and it left me feeling very smiley. Enjoy the warm tones, Reese & the amazing house the film is set in

The Holiday Watch if you are ready to skip to Christmas time

A house swap, a holiday, wine and of course romance! What’s not to love ? although I’d usually save this for Christmas time, I am learning to live in the moment. Enjoy the cosy cottage, the LA Mansion & watching them fall in love.

When Harry Met Sally – Watch if you’re falling in love with your friend

Find out the answer to the age-old question – can men & women just be friends? set in one of the best movie city’s – NYC. Enjoy the friendship & the realization of things.

Crazy Rich Asians Watch if you think you’re ready to meet your partners family or If you’re in the mood for a great wedding

This is fairly new but it is up there with my list of favourites. Finding out about your significant others immense wealth is always fun, unless it’s not. Enjoy the power-plays, over the top parties and love conquering all!

Letters to JulietWatch if you’re in the mood for not letting your boyfriend stop you from finding love

A baecation gone wrong, but it turns out right in the end. Enjoy the scenic views, the mystery love story and finding out that sometimes you don’t need to force something that isn’t quite right.

Bride and Prejudice – Watch if you’re in the mood to marry !

The songs, the outrageous mother, the colour and all-round lightheartedness. Enjoy the sisterly bonds, the fight to stay true to yourself and the dancing!

Happy watching! Please add your favourite feel-good movies you’re enjoying in the time of social distancing!