What to do when life is hard.

We all want to know what to do when life is hard? Life gets hard, this is just a fact, there will always be highs and lows. The most important thing is how you handle the hard things. It could be the fact that you made a mistake or that you have a difficult job or dealing with hard family members, a failing business or just the uncertainty of the times.

I recently read a book called The Undomestic Goddess – Sophie Kinsella about a high powered lawyer who made a fifty million pounds worth mistake! She ran away from the situation and ended up as a housekeeper! This is the short story… you can read the rest yourself. What I learnt from reading this is that there is no such thing as making a mistake that will ‘ruin your life forever’ and that’s the truth! One of my favourite quotes from the book is ‘‘ Life is a resilient thing…’‘

A few things to remember along the way:

Always remember that you are worthy.

You are not defined by your circumstances or even your slip-ups. Failure is an event and it happens to us all. With this in mind don’t forget that no matter what you’re going through and what people might be saying to you or about your situation. Don’t forget to remember you are worthy simply because you exist!

Remember to take breaks

Rest is so essential when things get overwhelming. Sometimes you might have to power through it but always schedule in time to just stay still. Being still is so underrated but it really helps you to confront whatever situation it is you may be faced with.

Your feelings are valid

No matter what they may be. Be honest with yourself about how the situation is making you feel and how you think you can cope with it.

Talk about it

Sometimes you’re shy or you don’t think you can trust anyone enough. You need to give people a chance to be there for you. A problem shared is a problem half solved. Your trusted friend might offer great advice or provide a listening ear. Don’t underestimate the power of talking through it.

Encourage yourself!

Speak what you want to happen and focus on that. Things might be out of your control but just focus on staying positive, I wrote about 10 positive affirmations to keep you going on the blog- you can find them here.

If you’re in a hard place or trying to handle a hard thing then hang in there! It will be okay in the end and if it’s not okay…… you know how the saying goes.

Share this with anyone who might need to hear this! Leave a comment below if you have any tips for handling hard things.

with love,

Ari’

Life In My Twenties feat Netflix Original – The Politician

Hello everyone! Back again after a much-needed break and I got the bright idea to start this new series on the blog- ‘Life in My Twenties.’

In the spirit of sharing, I have asked several people to write about their experience(s) of life in their twenties. Partly because this blog is an avenue to explore what that looks like for me and because why not!

Some of my inspiration for this series came while watching season two of the Netflix Original – The Politician.

This season we watch Payton who is now a student in his twenties take a second shot at his political aspirations. He is faced with all sorts of moral and ethical dilemmas which eventually lead him to question who he is and if he is able to accept this person. We also see this same question being asked and explored by his group of friends/ political aides.

This made me think about myself and my friends and the various phases we are in. I thought it would be really interesting to get different perspectives from different people on what life in their twenties looks like. Now, these are all people I know personally so I’m sure there’s some bias somewhere… I will be throwing it open to the public at some point but let’s get the ball rolling first.

I can’t wait to read the contributions to this series and what comes at the end of it!

Let me know if you would like to contribute to the series and what you think of The Politician!

The first post will be up next Sunday!

Ari’

10 Positive Affirmations to keep you going!

You are what you focus on. I really believe in the power of meditating on a word, idea, plan and watching it come to life before your very eyes. So much so that I facilitate vision board & goal setting – you can find out more about this on @the2020visionsquad on Instagram. Positive affirmations give us strength us to believe in an action we want to bring to life!

Today I will be sharing 10 positive affirmations that will keep you going when you need an extra push.

1. I am enough – simple but so efficient, we sometimes think we need to be more, or be like someone else. But you are enough just as you are!

2. I will show up for myself today – Showing up for yourself, however this looks to you is fine. As long as you are able to show up!

3. I am excellent in everything I do – We are not called to perfection, we are only meant to do things to the very best of our abilities.

4. I am beautiful– Say it, because you are.

5. I am deserving of joy – Always, no matter what-you deserve joy simply because you exist.

6. I am strong & capable of achieving my dreams – Yes you are, you can do whatever you want to do. Just keep on believing and the wish that you wish will come true ( a little bit of Disney for you).

7. I am who the world needs right now, I will not let fear get in the way.- This one I heard at a lovely session hosted by @tiwalowla on instagram sharing it with everyone because it is so good and so true.

8. I will respond, not react– because we need to protect our peace at all costs.

9. I live in abundance – we do not have a poverty/ lack mindset!

10. I am confident , I am resilient, I am worthy– because you are and that’s on PERIOD.

Go forth and conquer as you give yourself these gentle reminders whenever you need them! Please share this with someone and leave one of your favourite affirmations in the comments section I would love to hear them.

Ari’

Trusting the Process

We all talk about trusting the process but how many times have you thought about where you are and where you would like to be instead? If you’re anything like me, probably too many times.

So many of us are in a hurry to get nowhere fast, because when you get there you shift the goal again, and it’s back to ‘striving’ and doing too much.

I had a conversation with a friend recently and she mentioned feeling like she wasn’t doing enough … which is funny because from where I was standing she was doing a lot! She recently started a full-time job & is running a blog ( I promise I’m not talking about me lol) but somehow her mind had convinced her it wasn’t enough.

We can be really hard on ourselves, really impatient with ourselves. I’m learning to trust the process, slow down, and be present.

There’s absolutely nothing wrong with looking and even planning ahead but don’t forget you’re here now! Your life will only happen once and if you miss it well that’s it.

Stop and actually smell the roses, give yourself a minute to acknowledge where you are and love yourself enough to work towards where you want to be, but above all trust the process.

Today take stock of where you are, everything you’ve achieved, and look back to see how far you’ve actually come.

While looking ahead remember to be patient with yourself and be kind too, everything good always comes!

How are you staying present & trusting the process? Leave a comment below I would like to know!

How to Keep a Journal

I have been writing in Journals for as long as I can remember. It has been one of the best ways to protect my peace, plan my next steps and give my mind a break.

Keeping a journal can be therapeutic, it can serve as a guide and remind you of what you want. They are great for sounding out ideas you think might sound crazy or just letting out your daily frustrations.

Here are 5 tips for keeping a journal

Get a notebook!

This is obvious, but some people keep notes on their phone or laptops but going old school is really the best way to go. Actually writing out how you feel, what you’re looking forward to or not goes a long way.

Create the right vibe

Try and find a quiet space and time when you can really hear yourself think.Where you will be comfortable getting in your feelings, whatever those feelings may be.

Bonus tip: light a scented candle and relax

Go with the flow

Most people say they don’t know how to start. A journal is for you-there are no wrong or right entries, so a good place to start is where you are. You can write about your day, you can write about a feeling, you can doodle, you will be surprised where your mind can lead you when you just let go.

No pressure

This is all about you, there is no need to keep it routine. You can Journal whenever you feel like it. You also don’t need perfect handwriting or picture-perfect pages, just write and don’t get too bogged down in the details of how it looks ( unless that’s your thing).

Write out your dreams

We can sometimes be scared to say what we want, a journal is a safe space and will give you the opportunity to work out your fears and hopes. Write out those big dreams and watch them come to life.

Write the vision and engrave it plainly on tablets. So that the one who reads it will run

Habakkuk 2:3

Do you keep a journal already? Have you been meaning to start? Do you have any questions? Let me know in the comments below!

How to workout when you don’t feel like it

Fike

Today’s blog post was written by a dear friend of mine who is so passionate about Health & Fitness. The reason it was not written by me is that exercising, for the most part, is not something I am passionate about, although I understand the benefits sometimes I just can’t turn the knowledge to action.

Especially now during these times when we are trying our best to stay safe at home, working out is one of the best ways to keep our minds and bodies healthy.

This is where Mirafiit comes in. She has kindly shared 5 key tips to help with working out when you don’t feel like it.

Mirafiit

When some people think of exercising, they think of the obvious things – HIIT, Weight Training, Cardio. But exercise is so much more. For me, understanding the purpose behind a thing helps me stay motivated. On that note, I’ll start off by explaining the purpose of exercising.

We were built to move

Simply put, our bodies were designed for activity. If we don’t stay active, things start to go wrong.

We can sometimes have quite a sedentary lifestyle. This, in addition to overly processed foods and increased portion sizes, means that we have to make an active choice to exercise. Ideally, you should exercise for about 30 mins every day. Right, so now that that’s done, here are five tips on how to exercise when you’re not feeling it!

Make a choice

Change is active. You have to decide to commit to exercise because even though you may not like it, you need it. The benefits of exercise are vast, from preventing heart-related diseases to improving your mood and alleviating depression. Think about this the next time you’re not feeling it, your body depends on your decision.

Change your mindset

Burn the idea that exercise requires a certain type of activity. There are so many different ways to exercise. If you don’t like weight training, skip it. If you’d prefer to do a dance class, find something on YouTube and do it! Take a walk, go for a run, swim, do yoga. Do anything that gets your body moving for at least 30 minutes!

A little becomes a lot

Start off small. The last thing you want to do is set unrealistic targets. You can’t go from sitting on a couch all day to running a marathon. Set daily or weekly attainable and sustainable goals. Go up and down the stairs 10 times, do a 15-minute workout, take a walk. Review those goals as you achieve them and set new goals.

Increase your NEAT: Non-exercise activity thermogenesis

These are things you can do that don’t necessarily feel like exercise but actually help to combat the ills of our sedentary lifestyle. It is really simple, just do more in your day. Do your chores, clean your room, spend more time on your feet, walk round your house every hour, get a standing desk, cook, walk your dog, stand while watching TV. While I would still recommend doing another form of exercise no matter how little, increasing your NEAT is a great place to start!

Play a sport

Although this might not be possible at this time, when this is over you might want to consider joining a sports team (or starting one). Sport is a really fun way of exercising without feeling like you are and it’s also a great way to socialise. The key is choosing a sport you enjoy!

Thank you, Mira, for sharing! You can find Mira on Instagram: @Mirafiit where she shares more knowledge on all things fitness, she also offers personalised fitness plans.

Mirafiit @ The Active Brunch

Please share your comments on how you find motivation to workout!

Don’t forget to subscribe below!

Happy Easter all

To Understand [an understanding]

Be wary of yourself.

Be wary of your mind.

Be wary of the expectations you put on them.

 

Not everyone is you.

Not everyone will understand your spirit man.

This is for the ones who will take the time to unfold.

To peel back your layers and take delight in being enthralled in your essence.

 

Understand that a time will come when you will let them go

Those expectations that you carry so –

Close 

Enough that you often get burned.

 

Big wishes and bigger dreams.

They must not consume you.

Inhale the present.

Exhale the resentment.

Don’t let them bring you down.

 

To be expectant of someone who is still expecting themselves.

You may have found you.

Not everyone can.

Take some time to understand your fellow Wo(man). 

 

-Ari’

 

Femme Fatale

 

My definition: The ones they tell you and him to stay away from, the ones who know what they want and are not afraid to go after it.

Dictionary definition: a seductive woman who lures men into dangerous or compromising situations.

I have been feeling very inspired lately and recently there is a lot of girl power in the air.

My dear friend recently launched a website, dedicated to educating the masses and having the very important conversation of Feminism and why it is important. Here is the link to a truly enlightening experience  brag-aboutit  .

This post is about me redefining the definition of ‘Femme Fatale’ the popular definition is basically another way of saying women are responsible for the actions grown men take and I do not agree. It could also mean women are powerful and can make their dreams come true and I like this more.

The fact that women are seemingly more liberated in several ways is a good thing. I think it is important that women have the choice to be and  ‘Femme Fatale’ should be another way of saying free.

This post is hereby dedicated to my dear friend for starting something bigger than herself and for being true to her beliefs.

This post is all about the woman I have come to admire and maybe should examine more closely. Gabrielle ‘Coco’ Chanel.

I remember stumbling upon her biopic when I was about ten. That was something I’ll never forget because even at that age I was amazed by how she overcame the struggle and how used her femininity to progress, but despite this, she never compromised her standards and worked hard for everything she got.

I loved that she believed in practicality and comfort, but not at the expense of looking good. She redefined what it meant to be feminine and showed that black wasn’t a colour anyone should be afraid of. Although I am taking a path far away from hers, she is the very definition of Femme Fatale for me. She did it and was unapologetic in her ambitions.

Coco Chanel inspires me daily to be bold, seek more and put myself out there. I am failing miserably at all this but I am trying and I’m realising that’s all that matters.

So this week when you remember Femme Fatale, remember to be unapologetic and remember that your dreams are meant to be big!

– Ari’